What men really can't stand about women

Men hate it when women nag - the act of repeating the same thing over and over again. Picture: Thinkstock Source: News Limited

WHEN Allan and Barbara Pease were newlyweds they decided to make a list of the things they couldn't stand about each other.

He listed six things. She came up with four pages.

The lists must have scarred the couple because they have turned gender differences into their life's work.

The Queensland-based communication authors of titles including Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps have sold more than 25 million copies of their books in 50 languages.

Allan Pease spoke to News Corp Australia about gender differences that helped shed some light on the issue.

First, what men can't stand about women.

(Ladies, don't worry: Come back later today to find out what women hate about men.)

Women don't get to the point: When a woman talks to a male, what do you think he is thinking? He is thinking, 'what point are you making here'. We have identified a style of speaking in men that women don't have. Men use 'direct talk' - they have a start and a conclusion and they keep it shorter than women. Then they look blankly at you and that's how you know they have finished. Direct talk means men leave fairly clear what they mean, it's a style of talk that sounds fairly aggressive to women. Whereas women drop hints and clues hoping the male in his wisdom can work it out. For men it's all a big mystery. SOLUTION: Talk straight.

Women multi-track: When women are speaking their hearing is switched on. When males are talking their hearing is switched off. And it all comes down to the male brain versus the female brain. Women can all speak at the same time but a male would say 'ladies, one at a time'. Men either speak or listen which is the reason why when men talk there is only one talking. When he stops the next starts. SOLUTION: Take turns.

Nagging: It's only men that call it nagging, women only call it nagging when they talk about a woman they don't like. If it's a woman nagging a man she is reminding him of things that he hasn't done. Nagging - the act of repeatedly saying the same thing over and over again - is particularly a problem in young women. Women see it as reminding a man to do what needs to be done. SOLUTION: Set a deadline. For example, instead of saying 'can you take the rubbish out today', 'would you be able to put the rubbish out by 5pm today'.

Exaggeration: Women have an emotive style when they talk, they will use exaggeration to make a point. A popular one is, ''You always do it''. It only makes men seize on the definition of the word - ''I don't ALWAYS do it''. Another used by women is ''I died, I just died'' for little things like someone turning up to a party in the same outfit as theirs. The exaggeration makes it interesting for other women but for men it falls on deaf ears - YOU DIDN'T DIE! if it happened to a guy with an identical tie they would use it as an opportunity to bond. SOLUTION: Stick to the facts.

Not initiating sex enough: The urge to have sex is directly related to testosterone levels. Men have 10 to 20 times more than women. For modern men in business the higher they are on the corporate ladder the more testosterone they have. Women in top jobs in business who did hormone tests showed they have dramatically higher testosterone levels than other women - but also a lot more body hair too. SOLUTION: Negotiate on what makes each of you happy.

Shopping: If a male is going to buy something he will look for it online or in the Yellow Pages and then go out and buy it. For women, shopping is a day out. In evolution, men would hunt the meat, women would gather the salad - it's the same with shopping. For men shopping is a replacement for hunting, for women it's a replacement for gathering. SOLUTION: Don't take men shopping.

Girls, does this sound fair? Have your say below.

Later today: PART 2: What women hate about men

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